Man Woman & Mathematics

Romance Mathematics

  • Smart man + smart woman = romance
  • Smart man + dumb woman = affair
  • Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
  • Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

Office Mathematics

  • Smart boss + smart employee = profit
  • Smart boss + dumb employee = production
  • Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
  • Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

Shopping Math

  • A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
  • A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn’t need.

General Equations & Statistics

  • A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
  • A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
  • A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
  • A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

Happiness

  • To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
    little.
  • To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to
    understand her at all.

Longevity

  • Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot
    more willing to die.

Propensity To Change

  • A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
  • A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

Discussion Technique

  • A woman has the last word in any argument.
  • Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.